5 Inspiring Life Lessons You Should Know
You are not for everyone. And that's okay.
The biggest mistake I’ve ever made was believing I had to please every single person on this earth and in order to succeed, everyone must like me and what I do. False. This is the biggest lie we could ever tell ourselves. Not everyone is for you and that’s okay. Not everyone will support your dream, buy your products, promote your ambition or feel inspired by your brand. Maybe you can win those people over one day, or maybe not. The most important people to focus on are the folks who are for you through and through. Not just fans or your audience, but your support systems, your creative tribes, your mentors and supportive peers/colleagues. Just because someone refuses to validate your dream or idea doesn’t mean you are a failure, it means its just too big for them to comprehend. Educator, Lola Akinkuowo explains this concept beautifully, “There are so many people in the world who will simply never find value in what we do. Those are not our people. But then there are those who will consistently encourage you, inspire you, and create spaces that make room for you to walk out your purpose, and use your gifts. THOSE are your people.” Trying to be someone we are not just to appease the masses can cause more damage than good in the long run. Don’t be discouraged, be yourself. Keep in mind, even if you inspire only one person, you’ve done your job.
Nothing works without consistency.
I’ve learned this the hard way. You can’t diet and exercise only one day of the year and expect results. Sis, those unwanted pounds will make themselves at home without commitment and a realistic fitness regimen. Just like a fitness journey, everything requires consistency. At times, we get discouraged because time seems to go by so slowly and we want results immediately. But it doesn’t always work that way. Life isn’t microwaveable. It requires persistence. It took me 3 years to finally get serious about losing weight, I would jump on the newest fad diet or eat unhealthily and try to work out, never seeing any sustainable results. Not until I constantly meal prepped and started exercising 3-5 times per week. Slowly but surely I saw progress. Slow progress is still progress, don’t you agree? With consistency, comes sacrifice. Whether it be time, finances or resources, if you really want to reach the end goal, look at every sacrifice as a seed sown. Let’s practice consistency starting today. Want to write a book? Start by writing one paragraph per day. Want to evolve as a painter? Devote at least 30 minutes a day behind the canvas. Athlete? Develop a endurance routine. Whatever it is, just start. Today.
Social media is a tool, not a crutch.
Social media, both a blessing and a curse. Now more than ever, we are connected as humans through multiple digital platforms. Social media allows businesses to flourish and introduces a new kind of networking thanks to its connectivity. Just a click or tap and we instantly have access to billions of people and entities. Amazing right? Yes, BUT allowing it to consume your peace of mind is the not-so-amazing part. Likes shouldn’t define your worth or your amount of followers. Instagram makes it hard not to play the comparison game., trust me I know. We must recognize that social media is just one tool in our big tool box. We do need it to build our brands but it should not build us. I’ve learned that disconnecting from social media every now and then is self care at its finest. Even social media influencers and gurus get tired too! We don’t NEED social media to function in the world because in reality, we don’t own Instagram or Twitter and that’s something to keep in mind. (Unless you’re the CEO of Facebook reading this...hey!) If one day, Instagram goes caput, what do you have left that is yours? A website? An email newsletter? A online portfolio? Don’t neglect those other mediums for your brand. And if you don’t have any of these things, consider building something outside of social media that will live on forever.
Don't be afraid of change. Embrace it.
When I say embrace change, it can be something as simple as a new hairstyle or as challenging as moving to a different city for a new job. No matter the switch up, own it. For me, I’ve always had a deep fear of change growing up. I didn’t want to move to our new home because that meant changing schools and leaving the friends I grew up with would break my heart. If I knew then what I know now, I wouldn’t have fought so hard to stop it from happening. Sometimes new things can introduce us to a whole new perspective on life. Just like there’s a whole world out there ready for you to explore, it only requires you to step out of your comfort zone and get comfortable with the unknown. Every thing you want is on the other side of fear.
Establish Your Tribe.
PSA: not everyone will be in your life from start to finish. People serve a purpose in your world at different times and places. Some may stay for eternity and some may not. Its up to you to decide how it will affect you. Try to manage expectations positively with friends. Not everyone will be there for you when you need them the most and not everyone will show up in the way YOU want them to. Don’t take it personal. Some people just don’t have that capacity. One friend may live behind the scenes, while others are front row and center. When it comes to friends, one thing I know for sure is that you will build a solid support system I’d like to call, a tribe. Your tribe may be a combination of individuals who all serve different purposes in your life - a creative, a prayer warrior, a study partner, a travel buddy and the list goes on. The saying “your vibe attracts your tribe” is true to its core because friendships are an exact reflection of you as a person. Learn to grow with the friends in your life and if things don’t work out - don’t sweat it! No love lost. Just remember friendships shouldn’t be a burden, instead they should help you flourish to new heights.